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The Unequivocal Batman Game Theory


If there is one scientific theory that everyone should know it would have to be this. No, I’m not talking about the big bang theory. This supersedes that tiny, less significant theory. As a matter of fact I implore you to forget the big bang theory. It does not exist. Today you’re going to learn about another theory. The only theory. Behold, I present to you The Unequivocal Batman Game Theory.

This theory suggests that a Batman game can only be played successfully if the player has portrayed the role of the Caped Crusader in their lifetime. Researchers have found evidence proving that this is the only way to play and truly experience any Batman game. This is science people. Cross my heart and hope to die a horrific, yet comical death by the hands of the Joker himself. In order to be Batman, you first have to BE Batman. Now as a man of science (lol) it is my duty to put this theory to the test. It just so happens that yours truly was given the opportunity to play The Batman when I was 8 years old in a grade 3 school play. Needless to say this was a pivotal moment in my life. My best friend at the time, Joel Meggs, was cast as the Joker. We took our roles very seriously. Two best friends became fast enemies for the sake of entertainment. Oh the insanity. I think at one point I made my teacher refer to me as Bruce Wayne the billionaire. The things you do to prepare for a big debut. But in the end the parents, teachers and students could not have asked for a better performance. But let’s not dwell in the past. I have games to play and theories to prove.

I was Batman in grade 3 ergo I can play as the greatest in-game Batman that you or the citizens of Gotham has ever seen. In fact I pose a serious challenge to everyone who has portrayed Batman at one point in time. Being Batman for Halloween counts as well. Test this theory with me and let’s see who can be the most successful Batman ever. You can choose any game from the Batman Arkham series. This includes Arkham Knight which launches in June. Xbox users will be judged by their Gamerscores and PlayStation users their trophies. Celebrities, I’m calling you out as well. Adam West, Michael Keaton, Val Kilmer, George Clooney and Christian Bale. I’m giving you the chance to be Batman one last time! Are you (Bat) man enough?! Ben Affleck, I suppose you can participate too. Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice should be filming right now so once you wrap that up get your ass on board and take this challenge! Unfortunately, as science dictates, the rest of you out there in the universe might not do so well. The theory tells us that if you have not been Batman you won’t be a successful in-game Batman. But don’t let that stop you from trying to prove the theory wrong. [SPOILER ALERT] Joseph Gordon-Levitt, can you be a great Batman? Christian Bale left you the keys to the Bat Cave. We saw you rise, but we don’t actually get to see you take on the cape and cowl. Joel Meggs, best friend or foe? Do you have what it takes to be the best in-game Batman, not having played the role? I guess only time will tell. Godspeed Batman wannabees!

This could very well be the greatest science experiment of all time! Are you excited? Who’s going to take the challenge? Have you already proven that this theory is true or false? Do you have the trophies and/or Gamerscores to back your results. Please leave your comments in the comment section below.

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